Silver Lining.

Almost Valentines day, and this year I'm single. I say single instead of alone because....I dont really feel alone right now. I have loyal friends, and it just doesnt feel as alone. The last relationship was funa t first but it didnt work out, it didnt end with yelling or bad feelings. I think we both realized it just wasnt working. To me....thats a step in the right direction, that it wasnt something I was lacking, wasnt something I did wrong. We just werent working because we have different wants, different ideas of what life should be....and thats ok.

There's a girl I'm interested in but I dont wanna jump into anything, and frankly we have all the time in the world. There are other things I need to get accomplished first. I wanna go back to school, I wanna get to know someone really well, I want them to be interested in my writing, enjoy what I have to say and be my best friend as well as my lover. As it turns out I still have a great deal of hope for the world, go figure. I even have faith in mankind.

Ironically I wrote that last part as my head turned to watch a guy fake cumming on 40 Days and 40 Nights. If you havent seen it, watch it, damned funny. So I feel kinda random. You might ask what brings on this random celebration, well I had dessert with the ex tonight and it was good. We talked, she asked me to move in with her and her friend but I told her that her extracurricular lifestyle doesnt work with me and I just wouldnt tolerate living with it. But it was good cause she was ok with that and understood even if she wasnt happy about it.

I'm also looking forward to seeing Yellowstone this summer, Yosemite last year was incredible and there are times when I'm tired and laying in the bathtub that images of it still fill my mind. Always been a lover of nature. I'd love to go somewhere like that in the winter with someone, romantic getaway type of thing. Which makes me miss a friend who stayed with me for like 2 weeks recently, it was nice to have someone here to distract me from over analyzing myself.

Well I'm off to have a late dinner with another friend.