The Traveler, More Alone Then Ever Now, Came Upon An Unfamiliar Part Of The Path But Continued None The Less
Quote Of The Day: "The truth that once was spoken
To love another person
Is to see the face of God!" -Valjean, Les Miserables (the musical)
Tonights quote comes from one of the most moving musicals ever to grace a stage. I have heard a lto of music, seen a lot of plays and musicals, but nothing compares to Les Miserables. Nothing can fully express the horror, sadness, joy, honorn, nobility, and all the other things that make us what we are quite the way Les Mis does. The music from this glorious show has never ever failed to bring tears to my eyes in the end, the book does the same for me. I listened to this for a long time last night after realizing that my former friends had abandoned me, I realize it more today. Much like Valjean in his death scene I have a confession to make to those I leave behind me. This confession can be found on my other blog page which I shall leave in here, if you know for a fact that you are not one of those I feel torn asunder by then I ask you for privacy. http://minitia.blogspot.com/ there you are.
SVS
A journey into the mind of madness and into the heart of the confused.
Saturday, February 28, 2004
Friday, February 27, 2004
Im back again tonight and I feel that I must say something, though I know those of you that read are but mere passer bys of bordem. None the less this needs to be said. For some time now I have been trying to decide what to do with my life, where to go and such, well ive decided. I cannot stay here another year, there is nothign and no one here for me. My parents have one another, my family each other, and only mere remains of what use to be friends, with perhaps a few new exceptions. Im just tired of listening to others and caring so fucking much. With the exception of Mr. Happy and Ms. Quiet, and Lips the rest of what use to be friends are mere pieces of broken relationships. I have cared too much for too long and now I need out. So I have decided to go to Ashland with Lips and see what else is out there. A special thank you to Starfire for being there to listen and speak with me when the rest had more important things to deal with then me. So screw you to all those who have no exception, damned be you who take but never give, and may you find your way in the world though you do not deserve it. The world calls me and I answer with open arms and a smiling face. To all of you I damn you all; may you find out what love truly is the hard way by continuing to date the wrong people and never knowing those who truly care for you because your own selfishness and vanity get in your way, may you learn to pay your own damned phone bill on your own and find a place where you arent leeching off friends or family and learn to shower on a daily fucking basis stop coddling yourself and start reading something even if you dont like it because your too afraid to try and live in the world rather than leech off of it, may you actually learn to care about someone in the way that makes your heart feel good rather than fucking them and leaving them for the military and understand how it can hurt someone when you have sex with the friend that they love the most because she is that special to them, and the rest of you learn to solve your problems as well. I doubt very much if many of you will ever leave this godforsaken land but who knows, maybe you arent all as worthless as you make yourselves out to be.
Shawn Vincent Stengar.
Shawn Vincent Stengar.
After Spending Time With The Mirror The Traveler Continued On, Feeling Very Rested And More In Touch With The Quest.
Quote Of The Day--> "Its not my fault, I'm not to blame...............its not my fault if in Gods plan he made the Devil so much stronger than a man" Judge Claude Frolo, Disney version of Hunchback Of Notre Dame
Todays quote comes from Disneys light hearted interpretation of Victors Hugo's famous work. Hugo, a French novelist and poet who lived from 1802-1855, also wrote the unforgettable drama "Les Miserables", a truly beautiful work depicting the power and determenation of the human spirit, both the good and the bad. While I was not overly impressed with Disneys version I was satisfied with their portrayl of Judge Claude Frolo, the dark and misguided villain out to rid the world of evil even though it is quite often through evil means. One must admire Frolo on one level because he had the best of intentions and ultimately it was those intentions that were his undoing. Frolo was also a man given to being destroyed by the temptations of life. And it is here that we find the true topic of tonights thoughts, Temptation.
Word Of The Day--->TEMPTATION: "something tempting or enticing [syn: enticement] 2: the desire to have or do something that you know you should avoid; "he felt the temptation and his will power weakened" 3: the act of influencing by exciting hope or desire; "his enticements were shameless" [syn: enticement]"
Temptation, a funny little thing when you think about it, a driving force that you cannot explain, most of the time. But more on this later, for now we turn to Angel because she is far more important right now.
But to my next point, Angel. Angel I cannot stress enough that you desperately need to realize you can do better and with patience and time you will find better, you merely have to get out of this place and open your eyes to the sunlight. He Is Not Worth Your Time, Energy, And Especially Not Your Love. Trust me on this if for no other reason then because I just know. And no, Private Jackass isnt worth it either, neither of them are. True, they do have good qualities but the bad qualities far exceed the good and I know your trying to convince yourself thats not true but that isnt healthy dearest. You are a woman of great strength and greater emotion, even though you may not have them you will still have the rest of your friends, the true ones who like you for you. Just tell me what I have to do to convince you, what help you need, what will make you leave both of them in the past and continue on to something greater and more derserving of you. I offer myself and every resource available to me if it will help you to move from them. In addition to this I must insert here the fact that unless you are Angel herself then this topic is simply not open to discussion in any form in this arena, I am a secret keeper for many people and this one is for only Angel. Angel my dear I can help you merely have to tell me how "...I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder, oversideways and under.....". I know you do not love him, I do not believe that for even the briefest of seconds because I know if you did then there would be no concievable way for me to talk to you, no possibility due to the fact that it would be such terribly blind love that it would pain me far too much to talk to you. C'mon dear, talk to me, let us work this out and help you to get out of here and find someone new, someone else.
SVS
Quote Of The Day--> "Its not my fault, I'm not to blame...............its not my fault if in Gods plan he made the Devil so much stronger than a man" Judge Claude Frolo, Disney version of Hunchback Of Notre Dame
Todays quote comes from Disneys light hearted interpretation of Victors Hugo's famous work. Hugo, a French novelist and poet who lived from 1802-1855, also wrote the unforgettable drama "Les Miserables", a truly beautiful work depicting the power and determenation of the human spirit, both the good and the bad. While I was not overly impressed with Disneys version I was satisfied with their portrayl of Judge Claude Frolo, the dark and misguided villain out to rid the world of evil even though it is quite often through evil means. One must admire Frolo on one level because he had the best of intentions and ultimately it was those intentions that were his undoing. Frolo was also a man given to being destroyed by the temptations of life. And it is here that we find the true topic of tonights thoughts, Temptation.
Word Of The Day--->TEMPTATION: "something tempting or enticing [syn: enticement] 2: the desire to have or do something that you know you should avoid; "he felt the temptation and his will power weakened" 3: the act of influencing by exciting hope or desire; "his enticements were shameless" [syn: enticement]"
Temptation, a funny little thing when you think about it, a driving force that you cannot explain, most of the time. But more on this later, for now we turn to Angel because she is far more important right now.
But to my next point, Angel. Angel I cannot stress enough that you desperately need to realize you can do better and with patience and time you will find better, you merely have to get out of this place and open your eyes to the sunlight. He Is Not Worth Your Time, Energy, And Especially Not Your Love. Trust me on this if for no other reason then because I just know. And no, Private Jackass isnt worth it either, neither of them are. True, they do have good qualities but the bad qualities far exceed the good and I know your trying to convince yourself thats not true but that isnt healthy dearest. You are a woman of great strength and greater emotion, even though you may not have them you will still have the rest of your friends, the true ones who like you for you. Just tell me what I have to do to convince you, what help you need, what will make you leave both of them in the past and continue on to something greater and more derserving of you. I offer myself and every resource available to me if it will help you to move from them. In addition to this I must insert here the fact that unless you are Angel herself then this topic is simply not open to discussion in any form in this arena, I am a secret keeper for many people and this one is for only Angel. Angel my dear I can help you merely have to tell me how "...I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder, oversideways and under.....". I know you do not love him, I do not believe that for even the briefest of seconds because I know if you did then there would be no concievable way for me to talk to you, no possibility due to the fact that it would be such terribly blind love that it would pain me far too much to talk to you. C'mon dear, talk to me, let us work this out and help you to get out of here and find someone new, someone else.
SVS
Thursday, February 05, 2004
Along The Path Our Traveler Has Discovered A Talking Mirror. Here The Traveler Stayed Awhile And Spoke With The Mirror, Knowing The Mirror Spoke The Truth Of Many Things, For Everyone Knows That Mirrors Can Only Speak Truth.
Quote Of The Day--> "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."
Henry David Thoreau (1817 - 1862)
Our quote for today is about imagination, a thing more precious than anything tangible that you could ever conceive of. I spent some time thinking about imagination today, the effects it has on us, the wonders it brings us, and the pain that we can use on ourselves as a result of it. I have always thought that that which makes you the happiest is also capable of making you the saddest. This is definately true with people, just as it is with material objects. What led me to think about this is my thinking about fairy tales. Surely we have all been told a fairy tale or two of some kind at oen point in life. My personal favorites always were Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel, Little Red Riding Hood, and Cinderella. Now the clever person can distinquish the common bond of all five stories, the impassioned Heroine. But besides the strong women, I am forever captivated by the stories, stories that hold so much truth, so many lessons, so much happiness and sadness all in one simple tale made for children. More fascinating to me are the combination of these stories in a book or movie that you ocassionally come across. I absolutely love Into The Woods, but recently I re-watched The 10th Kingdom, a combination story of many famous fairy tales with its own unique twist.
Right now its about a quarter till 1am so I think I shall take my leave of you for now but I shall return later to give you more (I hope). So goodnight all, pleasent fairy (no, not the San Fransisco kind) dreams.
SVS
Quote Of The Day--> "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."
Henry David Thoreau (1817 - 1862)
Our quote for today is about imagination, a thing more precious than anything tangible that you could ever conceive of. I spent some time thinking about imagination today, the effects it has on us, the wonders it brings us, and the pain that we can use on ourselves as a result of it. I have always thought that that which makes you the happiest is also capable of making you the saddest. This is definately true with people, just as it is with material objects. What led me to think about this is my thinking about fairy tales. Surely we have all been told a fairy tale or two of some kind at oen point in life. My personal favorites always were Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel, Little Red Riding Hood, and Cinderella. Now the clever person can distinquish the common bond of all five stories, the impassioned Heroine. But besides the strong women, I am forever captivated by the stories, stories that hold so much truth, so many lessons, so much happiness and sadness all in one simple tale made for children. More fascinating to me are the combination of these stories in a book or movie that you ocassionally come across. I absolutely love Into The Woods, but recently I re-watched The 10th Kingdom, a combination story of many famous fairy tales with its own unique twist.
Right now its about a quarter till 1am so I think I shall take my leave of you for now but I shall return later to give you more (I hope). So goodnight all, pleasent fairy (no, not the San Fransisco kind) dreams.
SVS
Tuesday, February 03, 2004
Sunday, February 01, 2004
Forward Upon The Path Of The Divinely Chaste The Traveler Strode, More Pure Than God And More Clever Than Satan
Quote Of The Day-->"Men are confused. They're conflicted. They want a woman who's their intellectual equal, but they're afraid of women like that. They want a woman they can dominate, but then they hate her for being weak. It's an ambivalence that goes back to a man's relationship with his mother. Source of his life, center of his universe, object of both his fear and his love."
Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Cicely, 1992
I am really beggining to love these two for all their wonderful quotes. This quote could not be more right, yeah yeah I know im horrible for saying that. But really, this is absolute truth about men and the only thing I dont like about this quote is that it kinda portrays it as being a bad thing. Honestly, what is wrong with wanting a woman who can stir both fear and love in you? So long as there is a balance of both there is absolutely nothign wrong with that. Yes men are confused, we do want a woman with whom we can talk to and ahve understand and fight with us in a semi-civil way but on the other hand we have a driving need to try and dominate that mate. But the balance here is that we are better men when we find a woman who can match out intellect and allow us to dominate once in awhile then do let them do the same. In this we find a happy medium with which we grow and become better than what we are. Personally I have no "fear" of a woman who matches my own wit and intellect, in fact I seek that actively in all my female relationships. There are few things in the world quite as sexy as a woman who is intellectualy stimulating, matches ones intellect, is incredibly witty, or can melt there male counterpart simply by talking to them much less touching them. Well all that or one who can wear black lace and strike the perfect "bitch" pose while wearing it, but each to their own right? In any case, female intellectuality has always been a thing men (as a whole) have been afraid of because its not female domination were afraid of but rather female equality, afterall decades upon decades of being the prime sex does go to ones head (not saying we are anymore, just stating historical perception and what one is typically taught throughout primary school).
In other news. Well now that things are getting back to normal I am trying to get back to working on my novel once more, got kinda lost in the confusion of the past few weeks. Overon needs tending too and Avalon needs liberation. As far as Overon goes I am really trying to create a great enemy for him, not one you'll see a whole lot of in the first book but one that can really match him, and yes she'll probably be green eyed and red haired. For the first book I'm trying to pay special attention to Overons female counterpart, Chantal, and make her every bit as strong and stubborn as him but in different ways. I always take great pride in writing my female characters because I find it fascinating to raise them up and make them stronger than the males, quite a few of my stories involve Queens, Empresses, female military leaders, female warriors, and matriarchs of all kinds. I dont really plan on doing much poetry anytime, mainly because it usually just gets in the way of my other thoughts and I get stuck on it for far too long.
And as usual im counting down the months till im 21, then counting down the months till I go to Vegas. Birthday-->3 months or 112 days VEGAS-->155 days or about 5 months. As much as I'd love to see a lot of people come with, I know ya'll have things goin on but I know at least Lips is comin, so I've still got that. Just kinda bad that Angel and Mr. Happy along with Ms. Quiet arent able to come cause they wont be 21 yet by then. Dont really know about Wonderboy, or a few of the others I dont think I've mentioned on here so its a maybe on a about two or three of them and StarFire lives clear on the other side of the country sooo its probably just gonna be me and Lips for now but thats ok cause he needs to loosen up. But if any of ya wanna come, send me an e-mail and we'll try and work something out and ill give ya all the info. Quixote_Thoughts@yahoo.com And to pretty much anyone out there I am more or less looking for a female writer or potential writer with whom I can speak with and bounce off ideas, maybe co-write with, dont know yet but send me an e-mail if you're interested. Just once more about Vegas though, c'mon people, it'd be great you'd all get to see the "mighty" Shawn drunk off his ass and in a humbling situation or two, maybe learn some things or just laugh, whatever. Catch some great shows, have some relaxing fun, maybe the once chance to see me in that kinda situation. Anyway let me know before about May or June.
SVS
Quote Of The Day-->"Men are confused. They're conflicted. They want a woman who's their intellectual equal, but they're afraid of women like that. They want a woman they can dominate, but then they hate her for being weak. It's an ambivalence that goes back to a man's relationship with his mother. Source of his life, center of his universe, object of both his fear and his love."
Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Cicely, 1992
I am really beggining to love these two for all their wonderful quotes. This quote could not be more right, yeah yeah I know im horrible for saying that. But really, this is absolute truth about men and the only thing I dont like about this quote is that it kinda portrays it as being a bad thing. Honestly, what is wrong with wanting a woman who can stir both fear and love in you? So long as there is a balance of both there is absolutely nothign wrong with that. Yes men are confused, we do want a woman with whom we can talk to and ahve understand and fight with us in a semi-civil way but on the other hand we have a driving need to try and dominate that mate. But the balance here is that we are better men when we find a woman who can match out intellect and allow us to dominate once in awhile then do let them do the same. In this we find a happy medium with which we grow and become better than what we are. Personally I have no "fear" of a woman who matches my own wit and intellect, in fact I seek that actively in all my female relationships. There are few things in the world quite as sexy as a woman who is intellectualy stimulating, matches ones intellect, is incredibly witty, or can melt there male counterpart simply by talking to them much less touching them. Well all that or one who can wear black lace and strike the perfect "bitch" pose while wearing it, but each to their own right? In any case, female intellectuality has always been a thing men (as a whole) have been afraid of because its not female domination were afraid of but rather female equality, afterall decades upon decades of being the prime sex does go to ones head (not saying we are anymore, just stating historical perception and what one is typically taught throughout primary school).
In other news. Well now that things are getting back to normal I am trying to get back to working on my novel once more, got kinda lost in the confusion of the past few weeks. Overon needs tending too and Avalon needs liberation. As far as Overon goes I am really trying to create a great enemy for him, not one you'll see a whole lot of in the first book but one that can really match him, and yes she'll probably be green eyed and red haired. For the first book I'm trying to pay special attention to Overons female counterpart, Chantal, and make her every bit as strong and stubborn as him but in different ways. I always take great pride in writing my female characters because I find it fascinating to raise them up and make them stronger than the males, quite a few of my stories involve Queens, Empresses, female military leaders, female warriors, and matriarchs of all kinds. I dont really plan on doing much poetry anytime, mainly because it usually just gets in the way of my other thoughts and I get stuck on it for far too long.
And as usual im counting down the months till im 21, then counting down the months till I go to Vegas. Birthday-->3 months or 112 days VEGAS-->155 days or about 5 months. As much as I'd love to see a lot of people come with, I know ya'll have things goin on but I know at least Lips is comin, so I've still got that. Just kinda bad that Angel and Mr. Happy along with Ms. Quiet arent able to come cause they wont be 21 yet by then. Dont really know about Wonderboy, or a few of the others I dont think I've mentioned on here so its a maybe on a about two or three of them and StarFire lives clear on the other side of the country sooo its probably just gonna be me and Lips for now but thats ok cause he needs to loosen up. But if any of ya wanna come, send me an e-mail and we'll try and work something out and ill give ya all the info. Quixote_Thoughts@yahoo.com And to pretty much anyone out there I am more or less looking for a female writer or potential writer with whom I can speak with and bounce off ideas, maybe co-write with, dont know yet but send me an e-mail if you're interested. Just once more about Vegas though, c'mon people, it'd be great you'd all get to see the "mighty" Shawn drunk off his ass and in a humbling situation or two, maybe learn some things or just laugh, whatever. Catch some great shows, have some relaxing fun, maybe the once chance to see me in that kinda situation. Anyway let me know before about May or June.
SVS
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