Ahead The Twisted, Tangled Roots Gave Way To The Glorius Sunlight Above And The Path Became Clear Again. Now The Traveler Was Free To Continue, Complete With His Allies Beside Him
Im back once more dear friends and I am in a superb mood, so good in fact that I shall give you a second quote of the day. So your Bonus Quote Of The Day is:
"It's just human. We all have the jungle inside of us. We all have wants and needs and desires, strange as they may seem. If you stop to think about it, we're all pretty creative, cooking up all these fantasies. it's like a kind of poetry."
Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Mister Sandman, 1994
I am in a good mood because Angel and I have returned to our previous state of affairs and can once again enjoy one anothers company. That is all you need know, how or why is not important to anyone but us, or at least not in this particular forum. But let us adress both of todays quotes in more detail.
For the first one that I gave you earlier I am not sure I entirely agree. It is true that there is always sexual tension of some degree between people of the opposite sex, even if it is one sided. What I dont like about the quote is that it implies that sex is a large part of every relationships even that of friends. This simply is not true. My relationship with the White Lady has...well it doesnt have none but the degree of sexual tension is so ridiculously small that it is barely worth mentioning. To put it simply, im not attracted to her physically or sexually but I do appreciate the capacity of her mind and the depth of her thought. With Angel its a bit different, I appreciate Angels mind as well but I also recognize that Angel, as a woman in general, is a very attractive young woman. This doesnt mean that I wish a sexual or romantic relationship with Angel it simply means that something about her physical being appeals to the basic male instinct inside of me. However my current relationship with her is more than I had ever intended, because of the minute amount of sexual tension between us we are more comfortable with one another. With Angel I can lay down or sit with her in my lap and not have the least bit of sexual arousal, I can hold and comfort her when she needs it and not have one thought that I hold a lovely young woman, because I am seeing her as a friend in need and someone that I feel protective of rather than a being of sexual nature. My relationship with Angel borders that of my relationship with Sunshine except that a part of me can imagine Sunshine as a sexual being, whereas I cannot picture Angel that way. Sunshine has a way about her that seems to hint at a much more sexual nature below the surface, reserved for someone close to her. It may not be me but I do understand it none the less and I appreciate it as well because I have a very similar nature althoug not quite the same. Mine is more of a members only club that remains locked, that part of me is reserved for those who have the intelligence, stamina, courage, and patientce to get past the lock placed on it, the icy persona and serious demeanor that guards it must first be defeated or melted away. I think that my relationship with StarFire is probably the most interesting. I have to admit that there is a certain amount of old attraction still left but previous experience tells me to let the embers of a one sided passion burn as they will but do not try and light another fire. Now this doesnt mean that I dont ejoy fighting temptation but it does mean that the defeat of that temptation is what keeps the relationship healthy and fortunately I am strong and superiorly intelligent enough to always be the victor. The way that I am tempted by old passions, as one sided as they were, is a part of what made me keep and value my friendship with her because it keeps my mind sharp and my senses alert. The other part is that no subject is to taboo to discuss and debate in a logical and mature manner. But I have been kidn to these ladies enough for one evening, one might think me nice if I were to go much farther.
The second quote for the day is something that I consider an altogether different discussion. Though it is still about sex in a manner of speaking, it is also approaching the subject of poetry, the divine verbal paintings of life. I hadnt really thought about sex as a form of poetry but I suppose that it is. Sex, as I understand it, is something that can be presented in so many different ways that I am shocked at my having never considered it as an art before. On one hand sex is a very physical act and no matter what the nature of its preformance. Be it primal, loving, kind, soft, lustful, animalistic, or any number of other ways it still involves creative body movements and positions which, when applied with verbal attributes, can be considered poetry, or even without the verbal attributes. But sex is also a very emotional and sensuous thing that can be described so well yet never be accurate that poetry is almost a must for describing it. One must also realize that I am speaking of all forms of poetry not just mere words or rhymes. Sex is quite amazing in its poetic aspect in that one can preform that same act in the same position dozens of times but each time the meaning can be so very different, even dark if one wants it to be. One's true nature is revealed in how one practices sex, makes you wonder about the people around you doesnt it? To think that simply by having sex with them (simply? yeah right huh?) you can learn everything about their nature and what they are really like because that is the one place they cannot lie or hide, even the most skilled of liars, tricksters, and those who avoid direct confrontation cannot lie, hide, or avoid direct answers during, or immediately after sexual acts. So if you ever want to truly know someone and have the bravery to view them as they truly are then just go have sex with them, I am half joking but half not since it is a truth after all.
SVS
A journey into the mind of madness and into the heart of the confused.
Friday, January 30, 2004
Trying Hard To Regain The Path Of Normality The Traveler Continued On Down The Path
Quote Of The Day--> "Well, you're either lovers or you're wanting to be lovers or you're trying not to be lovers so you can be friends, but any way you look at it, sex is always looming in the picture like a shadow, like an undertow."
Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Get Real, 1991
Well there it is, your quote for the day. I chose this quote specifically because it has been reaised by my attention, from some, that lately my mode of conversation has been somewhat promiscuous. That kinda makes me laugh actually, but it probably has something to do with emotion balancing. Here in the last few weeks or so I havent exactly been jumping for joy so it only makes since that my mind try and balance by allowing some of my more hormone driven thought patterns to be released and my sub-conscious would naturally take that and put it into conversations that I have. Well all in all I've been happy with that extent of conversation because it means that more of "me" is being released and allowed to be introduced to be people. But, this doesnt mean that I am any less mentally impervious to seduction or sexual deciet or advances. I fancy myself as mentally impervious to seduction as that of a devout catholic preist (no not the child loving kind, the real good ones cause they do exist). Dont get me wrong though because the challenge would be a fascinating turn of events but still I would win, arrogant though that may sound. You see I have what others do not, the mind set that my mind is mine to shape and mold however I wish it and any attempt to pull or persuade it in another direction simply wont work.
Well readers recently I turned in some journal entries for my literature class which included the address to this site so that my professor (as well as other professors that I have given it to) might be able to see into me a bit better. I actually considered making my entries less personal and turning them to face that specific class, but as I thought about it I realized that this is really me, without any masks or toning down and I love that I am able to let people know that. Typically I am a quiet, reserved person but here I allow myself to express myself in anyway I like so that those who do not know me as well can come and see into my mind through this little window. I may come and post some more later but for now this is your lot for the evening.
SVS
Quote Of The Day--> "Well, you're either lovers or you're wanting to be lovers or you're trying not to be lovers so you can be friends, but any way you look at it, sex is always looming in the picture like a shadow, like an undertow."
Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Get Real, 1991
Well there it is, your quote for the day. I chose this quote specifically because it has been reaised by my attention, from some, that lately my mode of conversation has been somewhat promiscuous. That kinda makes me laugh actually, but it probably has something to do with emotion balancing. Here in the last few weeks or so I havent exactly been jumping for joy so it only makes since that my mind try and balance by allowing some of my more hormone driven thought patterns to be released and my sub-conscious would naturally take that and put it into conversations that I have. Well all in all I've been happy with that extent of conversation because it means that more of "me" is being released and allowed to be introduced to be people. But, this doesnt mean that I am any less mentally impervious to seduction or sexual deciet or advances. I fancy myself as mentally impervious to seduction as that of a devout catholic preist (no not the child loving kind, the real good ones cause they do exist). Dont get me wrong though because the challenge would be a fascinating turn of events but still I would win, arrogant though that may sound. You see I have what others do not, the mind set that my mind is mine to shape and mold however I wish it and any attempt to pull or persuade it in another direction simply wont work.
Well readers recently I turned in some journal entries for my literature class which included the address to this site so that my professor (as well as other professors that I have given it to) might be able to see into me a bit better. I actually considered making my entries less personal and turning them to face that specific class, but as I thought about it I realized that this is really me, without any masks or toning down and I love that I am able to let people know that. Typically I am a quiet, reserved person but here I allow myself to express myself in anyway I like so that those who do not know me as well can come and see into my mind through this little window. I may come and post some more later but for now this is your lot for the evening.
SVS
Tuesday, January 27, 2004
The Traveler Was Silent As His God Above Raged
Beware my dear readers for today I feel my temper flaring as it hasnt in a veyr long time. I am no longer depressed nor is my anger a soft and slow buring one. Tonight my anger is white hot and my teeth are bared. I did a courtesy by removing certain items from this journal but I am not so sure I should have. These next few lines are going to be directed at the one for whom they were removed. How dare you place anger or hurt above mine, if you have something to say adress it to me directly. Now I know this sounds hypocritcal my readers but the fact is I have done everything but personally show up on this persons door step. Truly i was surprised at the amount of support I have to simply ignore all this bullshit and just freakin forget about it, I ask myself why I bother and for once there was no answer. A few weeks my large backside, in a few weeks I will have forgotten and been able to heal myself enough to where you will not matter. This is more than ridiculous, its outrageous that it has carried this far. Speak to me and we can work it out, remain silent and im done, I dont have the energy to wait or to carry on any longer. Im not asking too much Im only asking to talk and work it out, not let it heal itself, Time DOES NOT heal all wounds it merely makes it convient to forget that they are there, speaking and working things through like the intelligent human beings we are is what heals wounds. So here is your quote for the day
"PEOPLE ARE STUPID"-Wizards First Rule.
Readers I am a writer and I use my writing as an outlet for my emotion usually as well as any over dramatic thought because I hate the BS that I've been forced to deal with. I absolutely hate drama, it serves no purpose, helps no one, doesnt have the slightest bit of fun involved with it, and serves only to weaken ones mind. If I sound offensive I am quite sorry but I am extremely angry about this stupidness when it shouldnt have come about at all. So to end the cause, ME, aka GIRLBOY, never ever attempt to post here again, ever. I know how to deal with people like you, a true waste of life you are if you cannot garner the courage to come to me or at least e-mail or call me, god knows I left the number and adress on here enough times. Lipstick wearing freak. And when you TRY and insult someone, try adressing something more critical then my Atheism because my faith in mankind is a thousand time whatever petty faith you have in some cheap ass god who cant possibly exist because your tome of religion is so old, so outdated, over translated, and written as a political/historical accountign that has become so diluted you'd get more religion from an episode of teletubbies. And if you were angered by my post about the military...well take your thoughts and go complain to society as a whole because anyone who supports organized murder is no better then those who commit it. Now on that note, Angel I know your part of them and you know I hold you aside from that judgement based solely on the fact that I both care about you and hold you in higher regard as well as Pvt. Jackass but understand my position on this, there is nothing I hold higher than the sanctity of human life.
SVS
Beware my dear readers for today I feel my temper flaring as it hasnt in a veyr long time. I am no longer depressed nor is my anger a soft and slow buring one. Tonight my anger is white hot and my teeth are bared. I did a courtesy by removing certain items from this journal but I am not so sure I should have. These next few lines are going to be directed at the one for whom they were removed. How dare you place anger or hurt above mine, if you have something to say adress it to me directly. Now I know this sounds hypocritcal my readers but the fact is I have done everything but personally show up on this persons door step. Truly i was surprised at the amount of support I have to simply ignore all this bullshit and just freakin forget about it, I ask myself why I bother and for once there was no answer. A few weeks my large backside, in a few weeks I will have forgotten and been able to heal myself enough to where you will not matter. This is more than ridiculous, its outrageous that it has carried this far. Speak to me and we can work it out, remain silent and im done, I dont have the energy to wait or to carry on any longer. Im not asking too much Im only asking to talk and work it out, not let it heal itself, Time DOES NOT heal all wounds it merely makes it convient to forget that they are there, speaking and working things through like the intelligent human beings we are is what heals wounds. So here is your quote for the day
"PEOPLE ARE STUPID"-Wizards First Rule.
Readers I am a writer and I use my writing as an outlet for my emotion usually as well as any over dramatic thought because I hate the BS that I've been forced to deal with. I absolutely hate drama, it serves no purpose, helps no one, doesnt have the slightest bit of fun involved with it, and serves only to weaken ones mind. If I sound offensive I am quite sorry but I am extremely angry about this stupidness when it shouldnt have come about at all. So to end the cause, ME, aka GIRLBOY, never ever attempt to post here again, ever. I know how to deal with people like you, a true waste of life you are if you cannot garner the courage to come to me or at least e-mail or call me, god knows I left the number and adress on here enough times. Lipstick wearing freak. And when you TRY and insult someone, try adressing something more critical then my Atheism because my faith in mankind is a thousand time whatever petty faith you have in some cheap ass god who cant possibly exist because your tome of religion is so old, so outdated, over translated, and written as a political/historical accountign that has become so diluted you'd get more religion from an episode of teletubbies. And if you were angered by my post about the military...well take your thoughts and go complain to society as a whole because anyone who supports organized murder is no better then those who commit it. Now on that note, Angel I know your part of them and you know I hold you aside from that judgement based solely on the fact that I both care about you and hold you in higher regard as well as Pvt. Jackass but understand my position on this, there is nothing I hold higher than the sanctity of human life.
SVS
Monday, January 26, 2004
The Traveler Was Once Again Attempting To Defy The Ocean Below And The Heavens Above, He Refused To Accept The Finality Of Things That Had Come To Pass
Quote Of The Day-->"The Wizard's Fourth Rule, he called it. He said that there was magic in forgiveness, in the Fourth Rule. Magic to heal. In forgiveness you grant, and more so in the forgiveness you receive." Wizards Fourth Rule from Terry Goodkinds Sword Of Truth Series Book 4 "Temple Of The Winds"
Forgiveness, it is no mere coincidence that this quote popped up in my head in this particular time, no coincidence that its words are so piecring unto my ears. For it is forgiveness that I seek, both to grant it and to recieve it. They who have been wronged must be righted and that which has been damaged must be repaired. I purposely speak vaguely because it is for speaking all too specificlly that part of this trouble has come to me. Today I have removed from these logs, a specific entry and entered in what I truly mean now, the person for whom it is written will know what it means without my having to explain further. There are few times in which I am rendered speachless and those times are either very good ones with me in delighted surprise or in time of great unrest where I am forced to remain quiet so that I can think, this is not a happy time. I must apologize for this rather vague entry but it is the best I am willing to give at the moment.
Word Of The Day-->Forgiveness "compassionate feelings that support a willingness to forgive 2: the act of excusing a mistake or offense OR The act of forgiving; pardon"
naturally our words definition comes from the American Heritage Dictionary.
SVS
Quote Of The Day-->"The Wizard's Fourth Rule, he called it. He said that there was magic in forgiveness, in the Fourth Rule. Magic to heal. In forgiveness you grant, and more so in the forgiveness you receive." Wizards Fourth Rule from Terry Goodkinds Sword Of Truth Series Book 4 "Temple Of The Winds"
Forgiveness, it is no mere coincidence that this quote popped up in my head in this particular time, no coincidence that its words are so piecring unto my ears. For it is forgiveness that I seek, both to grant it and to recieve it. They who have been wronged must be righted and that which has been damaged must be repaired. I purposely speak vaguely because it is for speaking all too specificlly that part of this trouble has come to me. Today I have removed from these logs, a specific entry and entered in what I truly mean now, the person for whom it is written will know what it means without my having to explain further. There are few times in which I am rendered speachless and those times are either very good ones with me in delighted surprise or in time of great unrest where I am forced to remain quiet so that I can think, this is not a happy time. I must apologize for this rather vague entry but it is the best I am willing to give at the moment.
Word Of The Day-->Forgiveness "compassionate feelings that support a willingness to forgive 2: the act of excusing a mistake or offense OR The act of forgiving; pardon"
naturally our words definition comes from the American Heritage Dictionary.
SVS
Friday, January 23, 2004
Today The Traveler Took a Rest, Sitting Himself Along Side The Shoreline Of The Mighty Pacific. Below The Swirling Waters Danced And Broke Upon The Ancient Rocks Reminding The Traveler That Things Are Forever Changing
Quote Of The Day-->"The most important rule there is, the Wizard's Sixth Rule: the only sovereign you can allow to rule you is reason." Wizard's Sixth Rule from Terry Goodkinds Sword Of Truth Series Book 6 "Faith Of The Fallen"
In todays quote we hear that the only thing that should rule your mind is reason but is passion rules reason then truly we are ruled by our passions. I, of course, am no exception to this rule except that I believe myself to have better control over such things, a life of thinking and meditation gives one better control over their feelings. However, as of late I feel that control slipping from my mind, but my question is whether that is a good thing or not? Perhaps by not having that rigid control I create, in myself, a sense of freedom. Of course everything written here is up for discussion in the chat box on the side unless I specifically note that its not up for discussion.
Today has been a less than amazing day but it was fair to decent at least. Today I quit work on "Westside Story" the director is a fool, his actors petty and jealous of one another and he has far too many people in charge of things so I feel that I only add to the problems along with the fact that when this show fails I do not wish my name attached to it. But I think I have also helped a good friend find a job so I figure my day has been balanced. Tomorrow I go on a field trip to the dunes with Dr. Metzger and some fo the Geology class.
SVS
Quote Of The Day-->"The most important rule there is, the Wizard's Sixth Rule: the only sovereign you can allow to rule you is reason." Wizard's Sixth Rule from Terry Goodkinds Sword Of Truth Series Book 6 "Faith Of The Fallen"
In todays quote we hear that the only thing that should rule your mind is reason but is passion rules reason then truly we are ruled by our passions. I, of course, am no exception to this rule except that I believe myself to have better control over such things, a life of thinking and meditation gives one better control over their feelings. However, as of late I feel that control slipping from my mind, but my question is whether that is a good thing or not? Perhaps by not having that rigid control I create, in myself, a sense of freedom. Of course everything written here is up for discussion in the chat box on the side unless I specifically note that its not up for discussion.
Today has been a less than amazing day but it was fair to decent at least. Today I quit work on "Westside Story" the director is a fool, his actors petty and jealous of one another and he has far too many people in charge of things so I feel that I only add to the problems along with the fact that when this show fails I do not wish my name attached to it. But I think I have also helped a good friend find a job so I figure my day has been balanced. Tomorrow I go on a field trip to the dunes with Dr. Metzger and some fo the Geology class.
SVS
Thursday, January 22, 2004
Traveling The Eternal Path Of Balance, The Traveler Continued On His Course, Never Ceasing But Always Wondering About The Paths Not Taken
Quote Of The Day--> "Passion Rules Reason" The Wizards Third Rule, Terry Goodkind from The Sword Of Truth Series
Indeed passion does rule reason, often times we find ourselves doing the dumbest things because there is something deep within us driving us to do that act. But more importantly about this quote is that if passion truly rules reason, then all reasoning is derived from soem sort of passion and that means that life is about emotion and not the lack of it. Too often we try and hide our feelings from the world, from our friends, from our family, and from those that our hearts yearn for. Perhaps a meaning there? Or perhaps just somethign to think about? Ill let you decide. The quote comes from a favored book series of mine that intriques me like no other and fills me with desire to create.
Well friends I cant say as though im the happiest person in the world lately but such is the nature of things I suppose. On one hand school and work are going quite well however I feel lonlier than ever, completely without the comfort of others. But I suppose this is all apart of the balance of nature, eternally weaving in and out. This doesnt mean I have to like it but at least i understand it to some degree. There are times when I wonder if I shall ever find another I can connect with, argue with, talk intimately and privately with, someone to be comfortable with, but most importantly someone with whom I can have a friendship with as well as an intimate relationship. Somethign does tell me that this person does exist, its just a matter of finding them or realizing who they are but to be totally honest I have no one inparticular in mind, only those come before and the possibility of those who are yet to be seen, so does the object of my affection lie within the past, present, or future? Who knows.
Word Of The Day-->TIME "A nonspatial continuum in which events occur in apparently irreversible succession from the past through the present to the future.
An interval separating two points on this continuum; a duration: a long time since the last war; passed the time reading.
A number, as of years, days, or minutes, representing such an interval: ran the course in a time just under four minutes.
A similar number representing a specific point on this continuum, reckoned in hours and minutes: checked her watch and recorded the time, 6:17 A.M.
A system by which such intervals are measured or such numbers are reckoned: solar time."
brought to us by the American Heritage Dictionary.
SVS
Quote Of The Day--> "Passion Rules Reason" The Wizards Third Rule, Terry Goodkind from The Sword Of Truth Series
Indeed passion does rule reason, often times we find ourselves doing the dumbest things because there is something deep within us driving us to do that act. But more importantly about this quote is that if passion truly rules reason, then all reasoning is derived from soem sort of passion and that means that life is about emotion and not the lack of it. Too often we try and hide our feelings from the world, from our friends, from our family, and from those that our hearts yearn for. Perhaps a meaning there? Or perhaps just somethign to think about? Ill let you decide. The quote comes from a favored book series of mine that intriques me like no other and fills me with desire to create.
Well friends I cant say as though im the happiest person in the world lately but such is the nature of things I suppose. On one hand school and work are going quite well however I feel lonlier than ever, completely without the comfort of others. But I suppose this is all apart of the balance of nature, eternally weaving in and out. This doesnt mean I have to like it but at least i understand it to some degree. There are times when I wonder if I shall ever find another I can connect with, argue with, talk intimately and privately with, someone to be comfortable with, but most importantly someone with whom I can have a friendship with as well as an intimate relationship. Somethign does tell me that this person does exist, its just a matter of finding them or realizing who they are but to be totally honest I have no one inparticular in mind, only those come before and the possibility of those who are yet to be seen, so does the object of my affection lie within the past, present, or future? Who knows.
Word Of The Day-->TIME "A nonspatial continuum in which events occur in apparently irreversible succession from the past through the present to the future.
An interval separating two points on this continuum; a duration: a long time since the last war; passed the time reading.
A number, as of years, days, or minutes, representing such an interval: ran the course in a time just under four minutes.
A similar number representing a specific point on this continuum, reckoned in hours and minutes: checked her watch and recorded the time, 6:17 A.M.
A system by which such intervals are measured or such numbers are reckoned: solar time."
brought to us by the American Heritage Dictionary.
SVS
Monday, January 19, 2004
Once More The Traveler Set Out Alone On The Path Ahead, The Future Uncertain And The Past A Rocky Mess, All Was In Balance
Quote Of The Day--> "An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind."
~Buddha
Todays quote comes from the noble Buddha, truly a religion of peace and tranquilty stemming from the embodiement of its namesake. I know many of you dont always understand some of what I say but I urge you to read and consider tonights quote, no hidden meaning about it but something I think we all need to consider. As a person with friends I hope that all mine are sincere. Friends it seems that Angel and I are to never speak again and to be honest I think this is probably best, many things have passed that have made each of us bitter towards the other and that cannot be healthy between friends. But by no means do I wish her malice or harm, rather I hope she finds her way in the world and that her luck never run out. I hope you will all understand if tonights post is less than lengthy. At any rate, I must look ahead to the future and what it may bring. My path down the road is only beggining and there are many things left that are yet to be explored for me, I just find it sad that Pvt. Jackass and Angel both, will not be there to join me. This saddens me a great deal and I can only hope to find two more friends as fiercely loyal and open minded as they were.
Quote Of The Day--> FRIEND "A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.
A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.
One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement: friends of the clean air movement.
Friend A member of the Society of Friends; a Quaker."
brought to us by the American Heritage Dictionary.
SVS
Quote Of The Day--> "An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind."
~Buddha
Todays quote comes from the noble Buddha, truly a religion of peace and tranquilty stemming from the embodiement of its namesake. I know many of you dont always understand some of what I say but I urge you to read and consider tonights quote, no hidden meaning about it but something I think we all need to consider. As a person with friends I hope that all mine are sincere. Friends it seems that Angel and I are to never speak again and to be honest I think this is probably best, many things have passed that have made each of us bitter towards the other and that cannot be healthy between friends. But by no means do I wish her malice or harm, rather I hope she finds her way in the world and that her luck never run out. I hope you will all understand if tonights post is less than lengthy. At any rate, I must look ahead to the future and what it may bring. My path down the road is only beggining and there are many things left that are yet to be explored for me, I just find it sad that Pvt. Jackass and Angel both, will not be there to join me. This saddens me a great deal and I can only hope to find two more friends as fiercely loyal and open minded as they were.
Quote Of The Day--> FRIEND "A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.
A person whom one knows; an acquaintance.
A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade.
One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement: friends of the clean air movement.
Friend A member of the Society of Friends; a Quaker."
brought to us by the American Heritage Dictionary.
SVS
Thursday, January 15, 2004
A Gleam In His Eyes And A Smile On His Lips The Traveler Turned Towards The Voice From The Void
Quote Of The Day-->"Through me you pass into the city of woe:
Through me you pass into eternal pain:
Through me among the people lost for aye.
Justice the founder of my fabric moved:
To rear me was the task of power divine,
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love.
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I shall endure.
All hope abandon, ye who enter here."
~Dante Alighieri
Dantes Inferno "The Divine Comedy"
Good eve friends, first and foremost is our quote for the day. This quote is from a rather old set of novels having to do with the travels of a man into the depths of hell to learn more about life, heaven, and himself in the process. Today I shall let you take what you will from it and you go from there. Because today is a rather special day, today we have several messages from "Me", a truly brave and courageous label if ever there was one. I have the distinct feeling that "Me" is a less than properly educated person, firstly because they spelled GirlBoy as "gurlboy, though that could easily be a typo. But mostly because they're arguements couldnt possible hold water. But I shall respond to them none the less. First of all "Me", this is my journal and my journal alone the thoughts here are my way of reflecting upon myself. So for your first message, I am pointing at myself no matter how you look at it, that is the intent of a journal or for any writer in general. Also, any thought, no matter how original it seems will (or can) be a reflection of some other thought that has been thought before by someone else somewhere the thing that makes them unique is that it is YOU thinking them for the first time (or not in some cases). Second, the "holier then thou bullshit"? LOL Dear boy this is my journal once again, and if I feel like playing God here then that is what I shall do no matter what others may want, if you would like to rant and rave then by all means do so in a journal of your own. We must also adress your comment of my Atheism, well I hardly consider that relative to any arguement you tried to bring to light (no surprise there) but adress it I shall, I must assume you are a "God Fearing" person, no doubt either typical Christian or those really over-zealous Jevoah's Witness and to that I make only one comment...it would be so much easier if you just take a Golden Calf and worship it, its pretty much the same thing. Fanboy is a rather unqie however intelligent individual though I might agree with the possibilit that he is less than calming to be around. However annoying is a individualistic observation of any one person, not always a constant, you must take into consideration that everyone is annoying some of the time and that since this is MY JOURNAL, I will no doubt be more annoying than I am in person. Now as to your being "Gurlboy", well let me put it this way, if you indeed are "Girlboy" then I have severly OVERestimated you and if you are not then please do reveal yourself. It is also possible that you mistook a nickname for someone else as your own, please e-mail if that is the case. But we shall assume you are GirlBoy, whos IP ADRESS IS 68.186.12, incidentally the same as Angels, since we are assuming this then what I have been told about you makes you far more intelligent then you really are, perhaps I may suggest actual education or at the very least a "Philosophy For Dummies" manual?
Word Of The Day--> Moron
"Psychology. A person of mild mental retardation having a mental age of from 7 to 12 years and generally having communication and social skills enabling some degree of academic or vocational education." brought to Girlboy from yours truly and The American Heritage Dictionary Of The English Language. Forth Edition.
p.s. get a dictionary or use a spellchecker before you type.
SVS
Quote Of The Day-->"Through me you pass into the city of woe:
Through me you pass into eternal pain:
Through me among the people lost for aye.
Justice the founder of my fabric moved:
To rear me was the task of power divine,
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love.
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I shall endure.
All hope abandon, ye who enter here."
~Dante Alighieri
Dantes Inferno "The Divine Comedy"
Good eve friends, first and foremost is our quote for the day. This quote is from a rather old set of novels having to do with the travels of a man into the depths of hell to learn more about life, heaven, and himself in the process. Today I shall let you take what you will from it and you go from there. Because today is a rather special day, today we have several messages from "Me", a truly brave and courageous label if ever there was one. I have the distinct feeling that "Me" is a less than properly educated person, firstly because they spelled GirlBoy as "gurlboy, though that could easily be a typo. But mostly because they're arguements couldnt possible hold water. But I shall respond to them none the less. First of all "Me", this is my journal and my journal alone the thoughts here are my way of reflecting upon myself. So for your first message, I am pointing at myself no matter how you look at it, that is the intent of a journal or for any writer in general. Also, any thought, no matter how original it seems will (or can) be a reflection of some other thought that has been thought before by someone else somewhere the thing that makes them unique is that it is YOU thinking them for the first time (or not in some cases). Second, the "holier then thou bullshit"? LOL Dear boy this is my journal once again, and if I feel like playing God here then that is what I shall do no matter what others may want, if you would like to rant and rave then by all means do so in a journal of your own. We must also adress your comment of my Atheism, well I hardly consider that relative to any arguement you tried to bring to light (no surprise there) but adress it I shall, I must assume you are a "God Fearing" person, no doubt either typical Christian or those really over-zealous Jevoah's Witness and to that I make only one comment...it would be so much easier if you just take a Golden Calf and worship it, its pretty much the same thing. Fanboy is a rather unqie however intelligent individual though I might agree with the possibilit that he is less than calming to be around. However annoying is a individualistic observation of any one person, not always a constant, you must take into consideration that everyone is annoying some of the time and that since this is MY JOURNAL, I will no doubt be more annoying than I am in person. Now as to your being "Gurlboy", well let me put it this way, if you indeed are "Girlboy" then I have severly OVERestimated you and if you are not then please do reveal yourself. It is also possible that you mistook a nickname for someone else as your own, please e-mail if that is the case. But we shall assume you are GirlBoy, whos IP ADRESS IS 68.186.12, incidentally the same as Angels, since we are assuming this then what I have been told about you makes you far more intelligent then you really are, perhaps I may suggest actual education or at the very least a "Philosophy For Dummies" manual?
Word Of The Day--> Moron
"Psychology. A person of mild mental retardation having a mental age of from 7 to 12 years and generally having communication and social skills enabling some degree of academic or vocational education." brought to Girlboy from yours truly and The American Heritage Dictionary Of The English Language. Forth Edition.
p.s. get a dictionary or use a spellchecker before you type.
SVS
Monday, January 12, 2004
As A Misty Rain Began To Fall The Traveler Took A Breath And Felt Humbled
Quote Of The Day--> "Isnt it ironic that the purveyors of peace are also the ones to hold the chains to the dogs of war?" Shawn V. Stengar
Todays quote comes directly and soley from yours truly. Yes dear friends that was me about two years ago or so. I believe it was when the those famous towers in New York were struck and fallen that I uttered those words to myself. But today is not about tragedy, today is not about ranting, today is not about a quote, and today is not about a lesson. Today I am here to humble myself, not before God, but before a woman. Today I humble myself before my Angel. She has withstood much of my anger lately, much of my sadness, and much of my ranting. So this is solely for her.
On Bended Knee
I’m sorry
You’ve taken a backseat in my mind
forced to watch and suffer through my anger
But you’ve been good to me
you stand beside me when I need you
your embrace supports me when I’m to weary to stand
I made a vow to you,
to stand against the world for me when you need it
to support you in every way possible
I’m sorry
I’m sorry I haven’t fulfilled my promises to you
I’m sorry that I’ve turned my fury on you
sorry that I haven’t thanked you enough
sorry that I haven’t been there for you
But I ask for your forgiveness
I ask you to accept my apology
but more than that I ask you for your understanding
understand that I would never hurt you
you are my light
you are my life
but I am yours.
Shawn V. Stengar 2004
Thank you dearest.
SVS
Quote Of The Day--> "Isnt it ironic that the purveyors of peace are also the ones to hold the chains to the dogs of war?" Shawn V. Stengar
Todays quote comes directly and soley from yours truly. Yes dear friends that was me about two years ago or so. I believe it was when the those famous towers in New York were struck and fallen that I uttered those words to myself. But today is not about tragedy, today is not about ranting, today is not about a quote, and today is not about a lesson. Today I am here to humble myself, not before God, but before a woman. Today I humble myself before my Angel. She has withstood much of my anger lately, much of my sadness, and much of my ranting. So this is solely for her.
On Bended Knee
I’m sorry
You’ve taken a backseat in my mind
forced to watch and suffer through my anger
But you’ve been good to me
you stand beside me when I need you
your embrace supports me when I’m to weary to stand
I made a vow to you,
to stand against the world for me when you need it
to support you in every way possible
I’m sorry
I’m sorry I haven’t fulfilled my promises to you
I’m sorry that I’ve turned my fury on you
sorry that I haven’t thanked you enough
sorry that I haven’t been there for you
But I ask for your forgiveness
I ask you to accept my apology
but more than that I ask you for your understanding
understand that I would never hurt you
you are my light
you are my life
but I am yours.
Shawn V. Stengar 2004
Thank you dearest.
SVS
Sunday, January 11, 2004
Still The Traveler Was Lost, Deep Within The Sea Of Thoughts Swirling Within His Mind
Quote Of The Day-->"He piled upon the whale's white hump the sum of all the general rage and hate felt by his whole race from Adam down; and then, as if his chest had been a mortar, he burst his hot heart's shell upon it." Herman Melville from Moby Dick
Once more we find ourselves with a quote from Melville and his book, Moby Dick, and again we are adressing the subject fo Ahab. This was not a quote FROM Ahab but it is ABOUT him. And again we are adressing the fact that Ahab, though not, nessascarially, correct in the way he went about his task he was still justified in his pursit of the white whale. But supposing he wasnt even justified in his pursit he was still a great man in that he took what he believed to be right and pursued it with all his heart and soul, not many among us can say the same for ourselves. Ultimately though, as far as being justified goes, its all about perspective when it comes to Ahab, this was not a real cut and dry situation unlike the pursuits of men today which are often wrong and unjustified. Take for example the conflicts between the over vaunted USA and down-trod Iraq. Here we see a conglomorate country (the US) attack a nearly defenseless country (Iraq) which we justify by saying "Iraq possess weapons of mass destruction) well big fucking deal, so do we and ya know what? Between the two of us, Id rather see them with them rather than the US who has no responsibility when it comes to weapons or using them. But all this is pretty much irrelevant when it comes to my, and im sure most of your, daily lives. However, what is not irrelevant is the idiots who support our corrupt government and our murderous military. The country we live in is a great one, built upon great principles that have not yet been realized or followed through with, but it is the fact that our government is corrupt and our military nothing but murderers in matching clothes, that makes our country less than great. Getting back to the point of day to day life though, it is these people who support all this that are the problems. Traditionally our military had been good because of its unique ingenuity but today it is because of the automotans and their dangerous weapons that makes us a threat to the planet. If ever the planet itself ever had an enemy we are it. But I digresss, the people around us, those who are in, support, or work for the military are just as much murderers as those who pull the trigger or press the button. I know two that are actively involved in my life. One is already over in the desert fighting and if there is justice in the world, (should he actually make a kill) then he will recieve what he has given. The second is foolish, without knowing the reality of her actions. Stupidity has known no greater friend then these two, both seeing only the profit they garner and neither seeing the damage they cause by being involved. Now I have never supported war but sometimes when it comes one must stand up and declare his loyalty. I do not support this war against Iraq, but I would willingly support a war against my fellows within these borders. I stand here now and tell you all that no man or woman who joins willingly into the service of this nations military (IN ANY FORM) does not deserve the precious gift of life, nor do they deserve to die, rather they should live a long life full of lonliness and longing for the joy that life can hold, the same joy that they so easily take from others by supporting those who would seek to murder on a mass scale. Not a one of these people take any of this seriously but I tell you that it weighs heavily on my conscious, how can i befriend murders, liars, corrupt zealots, and thieves of life? How can I support friends who would easily shoot and Iraqui man in battle even though he may have a child at home whom he has kissed, held, hugged, and cradled in his arms for years only for that child to have his father laying in the burning sands rotting away because some American FUCKER decided that he "evil", even though you dumb idiots have no idea what evil truly is? What gives these "friends" the right to derpive a loving woman who has had many an intimate moment with a man she loves more dearly than life itself, taken from her for the just cause of the Red White And Blue supporting American JACKASS? Nothing gives us these rights, absolutely nothing for any reason imagineable. Is it because your preident ordered you too? Just taking orders? Then lay down your fucking weapons, turn around and tell Bush and the ancient decripd senators and congressman to take your weapons in their own hands and go and fight the leaders of the opposing countires themselves and leave the people of the countries be. I hope that all you supporting or in the military sleep quite well knowing that a child will never see his father, never feel the embrace of his arms, never know his kiss or support, a woman will never know love, never hold her lover as you might, all because you are in the "right". You Sicken Me
Your Word For The Day~ Murder
look it up
Quote Of The Day-->"He piled upon the whale's white hump the sum of all the general rage and hate felt by his whole race from Adam down; and then, as if his chest had been a mortar, he burst his hot heart's shell upon it." Herman Melville from Moby Dick
Once more we find ourselves with a quote from Melville and his book, Moby Dick, and again we are adressing the subject fo Ahab. This was not a quote FROM Ahab but it is ABOUT him. And again we are adressing the fact that Ahab, though not, nessascarially, correct in the way he went about his task he was still justified in his pursit of the white whale. But supposing he wasnt even justified in his pursit he was still a great man in that he took what he believed to be right and pursued it with all his heart and soul, not many among us can say the same for ourselves. Ultimately though, as far as being justified goes, its all about perspective when it comes to Ahab, this was not a real cut and dry situation unlike the pursuits of men today which are often wrong and unjustified. Take for example the conflicts between the over vaunted USA and down-trod Iraq. Here we see a conglomorate country (the US) attack a nearly defenseless country (Iraq) which we justify by saying "Iraq possess weapons of mass destruction) well big fucking deal, so do we and ya know what? Between the two of us, Id rather see them with them rather than the US who has no responsibility when it comes to weapons or using them. But all this is pretty much irrelevant when it comes to my, and im sure most of your, daily lives. However, what is not irrelevant is the idiots who support our corrupt government and our murderous military. The country we live in is a great one, built upon great principles that have not yet been realized or followed through with, but it is the fact that our government is corrupt and our military nothing but murderers in matching clothes, that makes our country less than great. Getting back to the point of day to day life though, it is these people who support all this that are the problems. Traditionally our military had been good because of its unique ingenuity but today it is because of the automotans and their dangerous weapons that makes us a threat to the planet. If ever the planet itself ever had an enemy we are it. But I digresss, the people around us, those who are in, support, or work for the military are just as much murderers as those who pull the trigger or press the button. I know two that are actively involved in my life. One is already over in the desert fighting and if there is justice in the world, (should he actually make a kill) then he will recieve what he has given. The second is foolish, without knowing the reality of her actions. Stupidity has known no greater friend then these two, both seeing only the profit they garner and neither seeing the damage they cause by being involved. Now I have never supported war but sometimes when it comes one must stand up and declare his loyalty. I do not support this war against Iraq, but I would willingly support a war against my fellows within these borders. I stand here now and tell you all that no man or woman who joins willingly into the service of this nations military (IN ANY FORM) does not deserve the precious gift of life, nor do they deserve to die, rather they should live a long life full of lonliness and longing for the joy that life can hold, the same joy that they so easily take from others by supporting those who would seek to murder on a mass scale. Not a one of these people take any of this seriously but I tell you that it weighs heavily on my conscious, how can i befriend murders, liars, corrupt zealots, and thieves of life? How can I support friends who would easily shoot and Iraqui man in battle even though he may have a child at home whom he has kissed, held, hugged, and cradled in his arms for years only for that child to have his father laying in the burning sands rotting away because some American FUCKER decided that he "evil", even though you dumb idiots have no idea what evil truly is? What gives these "friends" the right to derpive a loving woman who has had many an intimate moment with a man she loves more dearly than life itself, taken from her for the just cause of the Red White And Blue supporting American JACKASS? Nothing gives us these rights, absolutely nothing for any reason imagineable. Is it because your preident ordered you too? Just taking orders? Then lay down your fucking weapons, turn around and tell Bush and the ancient decripd senators and congressman to take your weapons in their own hands and go and fight the leaders of the opposing countires themselves and leave the people of the countries be. I hope that all you supporting or in the military sleep quite well knowing that a child will never see his father, never feel the embrace of his arms, never know his kiss or support, a woman will never know love, never hold her lover as you might, all because you are in the "right". You Sicken Me
Your Word For The Day~ Murder
look it up
Saturday, January 10, 2004
The Traveler Sat In Thought, Seemingly Lost Amonst The Shadows Of Jealousy And The Feeling Of Despair
Quote Of The Day--> "Dont try to be a great man. Just be a man. Let history make it's own judgements." Zefram Cochrane
I know not all of you will understand who the person that gave todays quote is but for those of you that do, good for you. Basically this is one of those general quotes that states something we should all know but typically tend to ignore. This quote, in its simplest form, that you should live in the here and now rather than worrying about the future. I have found that despite the simplicty of this statement that its advice is so rarely followed, even I have trouble trying not to worry too much about the future. I do see the wisdom in this however, because I think that if you do live in the here and now and allow the future to pan out as it will then you probably will have a much more enjoyable time of life. Think of the possibilities when one is not worried about the future and can truly be able to concentrate on the present. Work would get done faster, people would be more pleasent to one another, wars would grind to a halt, and romances would blossom out of friendships and their participants discover new worlds in one another. But then again we live in a society who does nothing BUT worrry about the future.
SVS
Quote Of The Day--> "Dont try to be a great man. Just be a man. Let history make it's own judgements." Zefram Cochrane
I know not all of you will understand who the person that gave todays quote is but for those of you that do, good for you. Basically this is one of those general quotes that states something we should all know but typically tend to ignore. This quote, in its simplest form, that you should live in the here and now rather than worrying about the future. I have found that despite the simplicty of this statement that its advice is so rarely followed, even I have trouble trying not to worry too much about the future. I do see the wisdom in this however, because I think that if you do live in the here and now and allow the future to pan out as it will then you probably will have a much more enjoyable time of life. Think of the possibilities when one is not worried about the future and can truly be able to concentrate on the present. Work would get done faster, people would be more pleasent to one another, wars would grind to a halt, and romances would blossom out of friendships and their participants discover new worlds in one another. But then again we live in a society who does nothing BUT worrry about the future.
SVS
Friday, January 09, 2004
The Traveler Opened His Eyes To The World And Saw It IN All Its Raw Selfishness, The People Nothing But Spoiled Princes And Princesses
Quote Of The Day-->"Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee. Sink all coffins and hearses to one common pool! and since neither can be mine, let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, though tied to thee, thou damned whale! Thus, I give up the spear!"
Good evening friends and others, as you can plainly see tonights quote comes from Herman Melville in his famous novel of madness, determenation, hate, and pursuit of a goal. Yes tonights quote is from the mouth of Captain Ahab in the famous novel Moby Dick. The good captain has been critized by many readers of Melvilles, usually described as mad or over zealous but friends I have a different take on the captain. I believe the captain to be a courageous man who pursed his dream, abeit a tad recklessly, despite others who tried to drag him down. Ahab was a man with determenation to have his just revenge and finish what he started. Perhaps we should all let out work or dreams consume us so much as we will stop at nothing to obtain them. Keep in mind some goals arent worthy of your attention and they should be dashed upon the rocks. Many of peoples goals are often other people, even yours truly has come on this a time or two. Now not all goals that are people need be romantic ones, perhaps even friendships. I am here, toinght, to caution you on these people however, because the sad fact is some men arent worth it and some women are simply spoiled princesses not worth the time it takes to see their glaringly obvious selfishness and flaws of character. Men are no better, for they become spiteful and stupid with youth and arrogant and without morals as they grow older. Trust no one for they are not worth your time my friends. The only rule in life you need know is that people are stupid, plain and simple, dont treat them like they are unless they have proven it.
Bah fricking humbug to you all, may you never know the pain of a mistake when it comes to friends as I have.
SVS
Quote Of The Day-->"Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee. Sink all coffins and hearses to one common pool! and since neither can be mine, let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, though tied to thee, thou damned whale! Thus, I give up the spear!"
Good evening friends and others, as you can plainly see tonights quote comes from Herman Melville in his famous novel of madness, determenation, hate, and pursuit of a goal. Yes tonights quote is from the mouth of Captain Ahab in the famous novel Moby Dick. The good captain has been critized by many readers of Melvilles, usually described as mad or over zealous but friends I have a different take on the captain. I believe the captain to be a courageous man who pursed his dream, abeit a tad recklessly, despite others who tried to drag him down. Ahab was a man with determenation to have his just revenge and finish what he started. Perhaps we should all let out work or dreams consume us so much as we will stop at nothing to obtain them. Keep in mind some goals arent worthy of your attention and they should be dashed upon the rocks. Many of peoples goals are often other people, even yours truly has come on this a time or two. Now not all goals that are people need be romantic ones, perhaps even friendships. I am here, toinght, to caution you on these people however, because the sad fact is some men arent worth it and some women are simply spoiled princesses not worth the time it takes to see their glaringly obvious selfishness and flaws of character. Men are no better, for they become spiteful and stupid with youth and arrogant and without morals as they grow older. Trust no one for they are not worth your time my friends. The only rule in life you need know is that people are stupid, plain and simple, dont treat them like they are unless they have proven it.
Bah fricking humbug to you all, may you never know the pain of a mistake when it comes to friends as I have.
SVS
Thursday, January 08, 2004
Wandering Along The Dark Sea Cliffs, The Traveler Pondered The Mighty Ocean Beside Him.
Quote Of The Day-->"Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale
Her infinite variety: other women cloy
The appetites they feed, but she makes hungry
Where most she satisfies." ~William Shakespeare from Anthony and Cleopatra
Todays quote, from the Bard, is one I have always found very very appealing because in that is my ideal of what a woman should be. A woman who gives you everything you crave and then leaves you wanting more, of course he was describing Cleopatra here, but none the less I find that any woman is capable of driving a man to his knee's without ever touching him. I grew up around five women so one might imagine that I have the utmost respect for women and a more inside point of view that gives me better insight than most. I hve grown up around women of all ages, from the veyr young to the very old and everything inbetween, so there is very little that surprises me about women, not to say that I do not find them any less desireable or interesting. Actually you might say that women are my hobby, while I write and learn professionally, my hobby is further my study of women in every detail. To date, my best insight and knowledge comes from my friendships with Angel and Starfire. One might be able to guess that I hold both young women in high regard, and im sure they know too but if not.......StarFire I cannot think of any woman whom I feel more comfortable with when it comes to being able to express my opinions openly and also being able to share any experience with, Angel you are truly my Best friend in this world, no one accepts me so openly and you are the only woman whom I feel so protective over and trust me when i say VG is an idiot and he positively does nto deserve you, drop him and keep searching. And now onto todays word.
Word Of The Day--> Lust
Intense or unrestrained sexual craving.
1-An overwhelming desire or craving: a lust for power.
2-Intense eagerness or enthusiasm: a lust for life.
3-Obsolete. Pleasure; relish.
intr.v. lust·ed, lust·ing, lusts
To have an intense or obsessive desire, especially one that is sexual.
Todays word comes to us from the yearnings deep within each of our hearts, that desire and need for our most intimate wishes to be fulfilled no matter what they are. May each of seize the moment and do what is in you that most craves to be done. Take that smoldering desire within your heart of hearts and let the world quiver in anticipation of your needs being fulfilled and your wants being done at your bidding. For the men, for a moment ponder the world being yours and yours alone, to do with it as you will, to Lord over with an iron fist or to cradle beneath a vision of benevolence. For the women, find the man that gives you the largest challenge in life, take him and bend him to your will until he is truly yours and worships your every waking breath then raise him up to your level and treat him as an equal for then will you have a life long partner who knows how to satisfy you but remains just our of reach of your total control, who will never stray from your embrace and still provide challenge to you. That is my bit of advice for the evening. I hope you all take it to heart but if nothing else give it a second read over and laugh or something. Anywho, im off to bed, pleasent dreams to you all and may a few of them be of a promisuous nature.
SVS
Quote Of The Day-->"Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale
Her infinite variety: other women cloy
The appetites they feed, but she makes hungry
Where most she satisfies." ~William Shakespeare from Anthony and Cleopatra
Todays quote, from the Bard, is one I have always found very very appealing because in that is my ideal of what a woman should be. A woman who gives you everything you crave and then leaves you wanting more, of course he was describing Cleopatra here, but none the less I find that any woman is capable of driving a man to his knee's without ever touching him. I grew up around five women so one might imagine that I have the utmost respect for women and a more inside point of view that gives me better insight than most. I hve grown up around women of all ages, from the veyr young to the very old and everything inbetween, so there is very little that surprises me about women, not to say that I do not find them any less desireable or interesting. Actually you might say that women are my hobby, while I write and learn professionally, my hobby is further my study of women in every detail. To date, my best insight and knowledge comes from my friendships with Angel and Starfire. One might be able to guess that I hold both young women in high regard, and im sure they know too but if not.......StarFire I cannot think of any woman whom I feel more comfortable with when it comes to being able to express my opinions openly and also being able to share any experience with, Angel you are truly my Best friend in this world, no one accepts me so openly and you are the only woman whom I feel so protective over and trust me when i say VG is an idiot and he positively does nto deserve you, drop him and keep searching. And now onto todays word.
Word Of The Day--> Lust
Intense or unrestrained sexual craving.
1-An overwhelming desire or craving: a lust for power.
2-Intense eagerness or enthusiasm: a lust for life.
3-Obsolete. Pleasure; relish.
intr.v. lust·ed, lust·ing, lusts
To have an intense or obsessive desire, especially one that is sexual.
Todays word comes to us from the yearnings deep within each of our hearts, that desire and need for our most intimate wishes to be fulfilled no matter what they are. May each of seize the moment and do what is in you that most craves to be done. Take that smoldering desire within your heart of hearts and let the world quiver in anticipation of your needs being fulfilled and your wants being done at your bidding. For the men, for a moment ponder the world being yours and yours alone, to do with it as you will, to Lord over with an iron fist or to cradle beneath a vision of benevolence. For the women, find the man that gives you the largest challenge in life, take him and bend him to your will until he is truly yours and worships your every waking breath then raise him up to your level and treat him as an equal for then will you have a life long partner who knows how to satisfy you but remains just our of reach of your total control, who will never stray from your embrace and still provide challenge to you. That is my bit of advice for the evening. I hope you all take it to heart but if nothing else give it a second read over and laugh or something. Anywho, im off to bed, pleasent dreams to you all and may a few of them be of a promisuous nature.
SVS
Tuesday, January 06, 2004
As If In Some Strange Dream The Traveler Wandered Aimlessly Through The Dense Undergrowth Of The Forest, One Might Wonder If Perhaps He Had Tried The Mushrooms
Quote Of The Day-->"Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance." Oscar Wilde
Sorry bout not giving you a quote or word yesterday. Yesterday I worked, went to school to argue and bitch at financial aid, then went back to work. Eh, it never ends with this moron hole of a college. At any rate, I'm back and you have your quote for the day. Now let us discuss this quote. which comes from one of the great literary minds of our time the great Oscar Wilde. I cannot agree more with Mr. Wilde on this, men have this great ideal of being a womans first love and sweeping her off of her feet. Whereas women have the opposite ideal of being a man's final love, the one for whom he intends to stay with forever. Now I find both ideals to be quite honorable and thats all well and good but what I think what Mr. Wilde was getting at was that by knowing this perhaps we should get around it? I dont honestly know but I wouldnt mind being someones last romance and I have no high ideals of being anyones first love, though I wouldnt refuse. Actually a more experienced woman who has been through some relationships and learned more about herself would be my ideal woman, but certainly I am anything but picky. As you can plainly tell I'm still rather down and without any great inspiration to be happy for any inparticular reason. I suppose that before I feel like just going to bed and staring at the ceiling I should give you your word of the day.
Word Of The Day-->ROMANCE
The American Heritage Dictionary describes ROMANCE as
1-A love affair.
2-Ardent emotional attachment or involvement between people; love: They kept the romance alive in their marriage for 35 years.
3-A strong, sometimes short-lived attachment, fascination, or enthusiasm for something: a childhood romance with the sea.
4-A mysterious or fascinating quality or appeal, as of something adventurous, heroic, or strangely beautiful
Todays word is brought to us by, as always, that yearning need and longing for another human being in the world with whom this writer might be able to share true intimacy and thoughts with without fear it being used against him in some way. And on that note im going to bed and you all can just bugger off and read something else tonight, im through for the evening.
Quote Of The Day-->"Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance." Oscar Wilde
Sorry bout not giving you a quote or word yesterday. Yesterday I worked, went to school to argue and bitch at financial aid, then went back to work. Eh, it never ends with this moron hole of a college. At any rate, I'm back and you have your quote for the day. Now let us discuss this quote. which comes from one of the great literary minds of our time the great Oscar Wilde. I cannot agree more with Mr. Wilde on this, men have this great ideal of being a womans first love and sweeping her off of her feet. Whereas women have the opposite ideal of being a man's final love, the one for whom he intends to stay with forever. Now I find both ideals to be quite honorable and thats all well and good but what I think what Mr. Wilde was getting at was that by knowing this perhaps we should get around it? I dont honestly know but I wouldnt mind being someones last romance and I have no high ideals of being anyones first love, though I wouldnt refuse. Actually a more experienced woman who has been through some relationships and learned more about herself would be my ideal woman, but certainly I am anything but picky. As you can plainly tell I'm still rather down and without any great inspiration to be happy for any inparticular reason. I suppose that before I feel like just going to bed and staring at the ceiling I should give you your word of the day.
Word Of The Day-->ROMANCE
The American Heritage Dictionary describes ROMANCE as
1-A love affair.
2-Ardent emotional attachment or involvement between people; love: They kept the romance alive in their marriage for 35 years.
3-A strong, sometimes short-lived attachment, fascination, or enthusiasm for something: a childhood romance with the sea.
4-A mysterious or fascinating quality or appeal, as of something adventurous, heroic, or strangely beautiful
Todays word is brought to us by, as always, that yearning need and longing for another human being in the world with whom this writer might be able to share true intimacy and thoughts with without fear it being used against him in some way. And on that note im going to bed and you all can just bugger off and read something else tonight, im through for the evening.
Sunday, January 04, 2004
Built Upon The Ashes Of The Past Arose A Brilliant Future Clouded Only By The Travelers Doubts
Quote Of The Day-->"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away"
I have decided to try and give you, my patient readers, a quote of the day and possibly even a word of the day. I cannot guarentee that I shall keep up with it but none the less I shall try. Let us talk about todays quote. I thought this a particularly good quote with much truth in it. Too much of the time we measure our lives by how long we live, that is to say the QUANTITY of life, rather than the things inside that life which make it worth while, that is to say the QUALITY of life. Thus we have an age old arguement of Quality versus Quantity. For a very long time people greater than I ahve debated whether it is the quantity of ones life or the quality of that life that matters the most and makes life worth while. But how do you, my readers, measure your lives? If you lived hundreds upon hundreds of years watching the course of tiem play out but have few moments in which you are truly happy would your life be worth while then? Or if you were to live only forty years but have nearly every moment of your life be filled with such great happiness that it makes your eyes tear up from the sheer joy that plays out within the very soul of you, would that be more worth while? Truly there is no answer for the answers lie within each of us and our own personal opinions. Some would prefer a long life to a short but happy one, while others would rather have the short but joyus life. As to me, well I want a long and joyus life. As you all know by now I rarely answer any question directly, unless specifically asked to do so.
Now to our word of the day. Todays word of the day shall be, and I should tell you that the word of the day will probably have something to do with how im feeling or what im think, but without further ado the word of today is none other than............VOLUPTUOUS. As defined in The American Heritage Dictionary as
"Giving, characterized by, or suggesting ample, unrestrained pleasure to the senses: voluptuous sculptural forms; a voluptuous ripe fruit; a full, voluptuous figure.
1-Devoted to or indulging in sensual pleasures.
2-Directed toward or anticipating sensual pleasure: voluptuous thoughts.
3-Arising from or contributing to the satisfaction of sensuous or sensual desires. See Synonyms at sensuous.
This word is one I have always been rather fond of. There is something about pronunciation of the word that simply slides off the tounge. As one might imagine this is a word that is typically associated with women, and naturally I am not without thoughts of how, where, and who this word might apply to. ;-) Well pleasent dreams and goodnight dear friends.
SVS
Quote Of The Day-->"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away"
I have decided to try and give you, my patient readers, a quote of the day and possibly even a word of the day. I cannot guarentee that I shall keep up with it but none the less I shall try. Let us talk about todays quote. I thought this a particularly good quote with much truth in it. Too much of the time we measure our lives by how long we live, that is to say the QUANTITY of life, rather than the things inside that life which make it worth while, that is to say the QUALITY of life. Thus we have an age old arguement of Quality versus Quantity. For a very long time people greater than I ahve debated whether it is the quantity of ones life or the quality of that life that matters the most and makes life worth while. But how do you, my readers, measure your lives? If you lived hundreds upon hundreds of years watching the course of tiem play out but have few moments in which you are truly happy would your life be worth while then? Or if you were to live only forty years but have nearly every moment of your life be filled with such great happiness that it makes your eyes tear up from the sheer joy that plays out within the very soul of you, would that be more worth while? Truly there is no answer for the answers lie within each of us and our own personal opinions. Some would prefer a long life to a short but happy one, while others would rather have the short but joyus life. As to me, well I want a long and joyus life. As you all know by now I rarely answer any question directly, unless specifically asked to do so.
Now to our word of the day. Todays word of the day shall be, and I should tell you that the word of the day will probably have something to do with how im feeling or what im think, but without further ado the word of today is none other than............VOLUPTUOUS. As defined in The American Heritage Dictionary as
"Giving, characterized by, or suggesting ample, unrestrained pleasure to the senses: voluptuous sculptural forms; a voluptuous ripe fruit; a full, voluptuous figure.
1-Devoted to or indulging in sensual pleasures.
2-Directed toward or anticipating sensual pleasure: voluptuous thoughts.
3-Arising from or contributing to the satisfaction of sensuous or sensual desires. See Synonyms at sensuous.
This word is one I have always been rather fond of. There is something about pronunciation of the word that simply slides off the tounge. As one might imagine this is a word that is typically associated with women, and naturally I am not without thoughts of how, where, and who this word might apply to. ;-) Well pleasent dreams and goodnight dear friends.
SVS
Idly The Traveler Thought To Himself, Indulging In A Bit Of Useless Fantasy
Once again friends it seems I am without any romantic prospects, a fact that tends to lower my mood and harden me against romance. None of my current female relationships carry any romantiscism to them whatsoever and it seems that there are no others in the future either. Naturally this has lasting effects on my mood, sometimes causing me to write a lot and allowing me to get work done but it can also cause the exact opposite. Currently Sunshine has a boyfriend in Georgia, whom she is planning to go see. Thus extinguishing any possibilities there. Another woman for whom I have previously had affections, we shall call her the Dark Lady, is now going out with a stupid fat moron so no prospects there. The Dark lady and I were once very good friend way back in Junior High School, and through High School. However, during highschool we had a rather nasty fight and refused to talk to one another for quite a long time (nearly 2 years) and recently we found one another at SWOCC and we had been talking briefly and such but I found out she is dating someone. The other female relationships I have either have no possibility of romance due to the friendly nature or they have no possibility because of circumstances. Lately I have been in such romantic moods but no one with which to share them. In truth I long for someone I can send flowers, share feelings, confide in, and be comfortable with. But it seems such a person simply does not fucking exist for the world seeks to spite me. I find it extremely lucky for the world that I do not have the capacity for striking back at it because im afraid it would be quite in ruins by now. From this lonliness is coming burning anger, searing hatred, and loss for caring. I should be off now to go do something else before I begin to rant about things I should not in such a public formum for all to see.
SVS
Once again friends it seems I am without any romantic prospects, a fact that tends to lower my mood and harden me against romance. None of my current female relationships carry any romantiscism to them whatsoever and it seems that there are no others in the future either. Naturally this has lasting effects on my mood, sometimes causing me to write a lot and allowing me to get work done but it can also cause the exact opposite. Currently Sunshine has a boyfriend in Georgia, whom she is planning to go see. Thus extinguishing any possibilities there. Another woman for whom I have previously had affections, we shall call her the Dark Lady, is now going out with a stupid fat moron so no prospects there. The Dark lady and I were once very good friend way back in Junior High School, and through High School. However, during highschool we had a rather nasty fight and refused to talk to one another for quite a long time (nearly 2 years) and recently we found one another at SWOCC and we had been talking briefly and such but I found out she is dating someone. The other female relationships I have either have no possibility of romance due to the friendly nature or they have no possibility because of circumstances. Lately I have been in such romantic moods but no one with which to share them. In truth I long for someone I can send flowers, share feelings, confide in, and be comfortable with. But it seems such a person simply does not fucking exist for the world seeks to spite me. I find it extremely lucky for the world that I do not have the capacity for striking back at it because im afraid it would be quite in ruins by now. From this lonliness is coming burning anger, searing hatred, and loss for caring. I should be off now to go do something else before I begin to rant about things I should not in such a public formum for all to see.
SVS
Saturday, January 03, 2004
Despite The Great Storms Challenging Him Outside The Cave, The Traveler Felt He Must Move On
Ahh, it must be nearly time to return to classes at SWOCC because I am back to feeling down again and life is returning to its usual balance of good and bad. Some of the bad I wont go into detail on because its not all that important but has to deal with legality issues anyway. However I must confess I feel rather depressed these days again, as always the largest cause of this is lonliness and my meditation exercises being less and less useful the deeper that feeling gets. Naturally the answer is easy however obtaining the subject of that answer proves more difficult than one could anticipate. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the best advice I ever got to solve this problem came from my best male friend Pvt. Jackass "...man you just need to get laid." And as I've said to Pvt. Jackass, its really not as easy to do as it is to say. There is more to it than just going out, getting drunk and sleeping whoever your with, that dear friends is beneath me. There is much to consider when thinking of this solution, one must consider the relationship or intended relationship with the other person, the compatibility both sexually and emotionally, the mood and time in which to initate the mating process, as well as numerous other things. Were it as simple as we are all led to believe then we would all be far less stressed but that is simply not the case. I must also confess that part of my rather sullen mood stems from the fact I have just finished the 5th Harry Potter book and reading the last published book of a series and having to wait for the next always brings me down a bit because I get enraptured by the plotline and the characters, yet another reason to get going on my novel if only my partners would move their arses. I will also be trying to find test readers whom I can trust as we write this newest story and see how they think the plotline is developing and if the characters are real enough, of course they would receive a special notation and such in the book when and if it ever got published. Angel, and Starfire are, of course, my first thoughts but if anyone else would like a chance to review it as it progresses then feel free to e-mail, call, or write me.
Quixote_Thoughts@yahoo.com
541-290-4752
Shawn V. Stengar
P.O. Box 649
North Bend, Oregon, 97459
Of course, I am always happy to recieve any kind of contact through any of these ways from anyone just to chat or tell me their problems, ect ect. Im afraid I dont always find time to tlak on the phone but I rpomise I shall try and I nearly always find time to write e-mails or physical letters back as often as possible. In any case I think I shall go find something constructive to do, good eve to you all.
SVS
Ahh, it must be nearly time to return to classes at SWOCC because I am back to feeling down again and life is returning to its usual balance of good and bad. Some of the bad I wont go into detail on because its not all that important but has to deal with legality issues anyway. However I must confess I feel rather depressed these days again, as always the largest cause of this is lonliness and my meditation exercises being less and less useful the deeper that feeling gets. Naturally the answer is easy however obtaining the subject of that answer proves more difficult than one could anticipate. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the best advice I ever got to solve this problem came from my best male friend Pvt. Jackass "...man you just need to get laid." And as I've said to Pvt. Jackass, its really not as easy to do as it is to say. There is more to it than just going out, getting drunk and sleeping whoever your with, that dear friends is beneath me. There is much to consider when thinking of this solution, one must consider the relationship or intended relationship with the other person, the compatibility both sexually and emotionally, the mood and time in which to initate the mating process, as well as numerous other things. Were it as simple as we are all led to believe then we would all be far less stressed but that is simply not the case. I must also confess that part of my rather sullen mood stems from the fact I have just finished the 5th Harry Potter book and reading the last published book of a series and having to wait for the next always brings me down a bit because I get enraptured by the plotline and the characters, yet another reason to get going on my novel if only my partners would move their arses. I will also be trying to find test readers whom I can trust as we write this newest story and see how they think the plotline is developing and if the characters are real enough, of course they would receive a special notation and such in the book when and if it ever got published. Angel, and Starfire are, of course, my first thoughts but if anyone else would like a chance to review it as it progresses then feel free to e-mail, call, or write me.
Quixote_Thoughts@yahoo.com
541-290-4752
Shawn V. Stengar
P.O. Box 649
North Bend, Oregon, 97459
Of course, I am always happy to recieve any kind of contact through any of these ways from anyone just to chat or tell me their problems, ect ect. Im afraid I dont always find time to tlak on the phone but I rpomise I shall try and I nearly always find time to write e-mails or physical letters back as often as possible. In any case I think I shall go find something constructive to do, good eve to you all.
SVS
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